The Book Of Life

By Ron Ciancutti

My wife and I were putting together a birthday card for one of our nephews. We stuck a couple $20 bills and a picture of him when he was much younger in the envelope and sealed it. She said, “This envelope is pretty big, it might need two stamps.” I said, “Sure, put another on.” Then she added, “But are you sure? It might only need one.” This was when a basic difference between us emerged. In my mind, the small cost of adding another stamp was a no-brainer and assured:

• Peace of mind, knowing it would arrive because, if anything, it had too much postage.
• The valuable items inside would not be floating around the postal service over fifty cents.
• The extra postage would ensure timely delivery, arriving for his birthday, and not late.

All of this for a mere stamp—two quarters; there was nothing to debate—just put it on there.

For The Love Of A Dollar
But she didn’t see the logic of wasting postage. The reasons I listed above meant nothing to her. This is the same woman who looks at me, shaking her head, while standing behind a grocery cart with $200 of goods in it and says, “This same olive oil is a dollar cheaper at the other store.” I shrug, point to the cart, and say, “But we’ve already spent $200 plus here—just get it. I’ll lose the difference in gasoline by the time I take you there.”

Her lip firms up as she puts it back, “No—I just can’t justify this.” And off we go to the other store with $200 of stuff in the trunk. When she returns to the car, she shows me the price tag and, indeed, she has saved $1.02, and I’ve had a nice nap and burned $3 of gas with the a/c running while she was in the store.

Speaking of cars, we bought one last month. My wife painstakingly shaved every extra feature off the model, including a preference for a 5-speed stick shift over automatic drive. When we picked it up, she frowned. “I thought leather seats were standard—they last so much longer.” “Uh, no,” I said. She took it in stride as I sat there working the 5-speed shifter. She stripped the car down to the basics, but expected leather seating; that’s my girl.

Chapter And Verse
This type of thinking works for her and how she navigates life. I have some peculiarities, too. I tried to pass them along to children one through four, but they only accepted some pieces. But the other night, as I spoke to child number five, who’s away at college now, I realized he got the whole thing.

For example, he landed an internship with the university and will be working with some of the top departmental brass in his field in pursuit of his chosen career (biometrics and physical conditioning). I asked what his “plan of attack” was going to be. My son listed the following opportunities with such rapid-fire assurance that I had to laugh (like Santa) “in spite of myself.”

• He starts at 5:30 a.m. Monday through Friday. He gets up early anyway, so why not take the earliest shift? The supervision appreciates being able to fill that shift because no one else wants it, and anything he does as a positive in that part of the day is clearly his contribution because he will work alone at that hour. He can really shine and show his reliability and dedication. This is page one of my “How to Live” manual—I call it a Fair Advantage. If the field is level, there are always minor opportunities to improve your reputation by outperforming others. Look for those moments and break away from the pack.
• He observes eight or 10 tasks that should be done every day but have “slipped” or been neglected over time, and he can easily put those items back on track for more proof of his diligence. This is another page from my book: Someone will inevitably ask when this or that got so much better or more reliable, and the answer will include your name. “It’s been better since that intern arrived.”
• He identifies one goal in particular, to be so important that the company will want to keep him a second semester with the hope that his internship may turn into a job opportunity, since he has saved some of the veterans a lot of work just by being efficient. He wants to become indispensable. This is an absolute must. You can hint at this throughout the internship if you do it carefully. “Next semester when I’m gone, be sure somebody keeps this going because it saves a lot of time.” I recall a co-worker at one of my previous jobs who went into the boss’s office whenever he left it and tidied up his desk (lining up messages in the order of their time, making a neatly stacked row of memos so the topics could be seen and accessed quickly, etc.). She had little talent otherwise, but her best asset was organizing, and the boss appreciated that efficiency so much that he kept her around indefinitely.

And so on and so on. Very simply, my son understood my life philosophy that the shortest path between two points is a straight line. If you can identify possible obstacles before they even arise, you are well on your way to success.

The Choices We Make
Do you remember the old comic book days of Archie and his Friends and the two girls Archie was always fickle over? Betty was the everyday girl, hair in a ponytail, no makeup, no frills, an honest and beautiful blonde. She looked just as good with her hair down as she did with it in a baseball cap. She was fun-loving and never asked much of Archie, but she secretly adored him. Although Archie cared for her, he couldn’t shake his passionate attraction to Veronica. She was the high-maintenance rich girl who pouted and got her way. She liked Archie but was more interested in him when he was paying attention to Betty. But year after year, Archie couldn’t help how drawn he was to spoiled brat Veronica—the forbidden fruit. Most episodes watched him walk the line between doing the right thing and paying some sort of penance for being drawn to the wrong thing.

I find most of life contains “Betty or Veronica” decisions. We know the right thing to do. We also know what temptation looks like and why we pause before we sometimes engage the wrong thing.

But folks, this is your life we’re talking about here. Not a comic book. Not a summer job at a burger joint. Not a high-school crush. A lifestyle, a career, a spouse. Put the extra stamp on. Get it delivered and be sure it arrives. The maturity that this lifestyle exemplifies will pay dividends in the end.

Ron Ciancutti has worked in the parks and recreation industry since he was 16 years old, covering everything from maintenance, operations, engineering, surveying, park management, design, planning, recreation, and finance. He holds a B.S. in Business from Bowling Green State University and an M.B.A. from Baldwin Wallace University. He has held his current position as Director of Procurement since 1990. He is not on Facebook, but he can be reached at ron@northstarpubs.com.